The Lighter Side of Management Practices

A. The salary theorem

Therefore, the less knowledge you have, the more money you get. This explains why bosses get more salary than subordinates.

B. On management of conflicts and resolution

Once an insect fell into a glass of beer. The following were the reactions of various countrymen:

• Englishman keeps the beer down and walks away.
• American throws the insect out and drinks the beer.
  
• Japanese drinks the beer with the insect.
  
• Chinaman eats the insect and throws away the beer.
  
• Gujarati Indian sells the insect to the Chinaman and the beer to the American.
  
• Pakistani accuses India of putting the insect in the beer, links it the Kashmir issue and gets a loan from USA for buying another glass of beer.

C. The secret of the Army’s efficiency

Ever wonder why the Army is so efficient? Because the rules there, are so simple. There are only two rules:

1. If something moves, salute it and
2. If it does not, polish it.

D. Why are my office staff always so tired?

At first it puzzled me that my office staff should always appear so tired and exhausted. So, I engaged a consultant (not COSMODE!) who, after an elaborate study, found out the cause. The staff were tired because of they were getting more than enough exercise doing the following:

• Jumping to conclusions
  
• Beating around the bush
  
• Running down their boss
  
• Going round in circles
  
• Dragging their feat
  
• Passing the buck
  
• Climbing the ladder
  
• Wading through paper work
  
• Pulling strings
  
• Throwing their weight around
  
• Bending the rules

(Source: Material for Your House Journal, an e-mail sent by P.K. Doraiswamy to the Director of RIM, Semtokha)